A Recent Discovery

Things truly are better when you are thinner. Now, before any of you decide to meet me in a dark alley and beat the remaining fat off my body, hear me out.

I used to be a size 18, so believe me when I say I know how frustrating life can be when you are plus sized, especially when you are also short as well. I oft found myself wondering why every plus size designer thinks we larger ladies love to dress in gaudy prints and clothing so elderly looking my grandmother would not even want to wear it. Thank God for the obesity "epidemic" in America forcing those who carry plus size clothing to reevaluate what overweight women want to buy and there are now some good resources for more stylish and trendier clothing that fits those in the 14-24 size range (such as Torrid and Lane Bryant).

That being said though, I can't even tell you how much more awesome shopping is now that I am a size 8 instead (and yes, I realize that was totally bad grammar but that is how exciting it is to be able to wear whatever you want). I recently went to a couple of the local thrift stores to replace some key wardrobe items since I still have some weight to lose and do not want to invest much money in something that is only going to fit for less than a year. I was not looking forward to this as I remember going thrift store shopping in my younger years trying to find cool sweaters like the ones my smaller, trendier friends found and never having any success finding anything even remotely attractive in my size. I apprehensively decided to give it another whirl though because it is my only feasible option at this time since I am pretending to be frugal during this stage in my life. Besides, how hard can it be to find black skirts and plain cardigans for work, right?

Answer: not hard at all with my current size. I made a killing, finding 4 black skirts and 5 sweaters for $31. Yes, $31 and I am so not kidding. I have zero patience and am a power shopper so for me to do that well in under an hour total at 2 different thrift stores is almost unbelievable but believe it because it happened and I attribute this glorious experience to my smaller size.

I don't tell you all this to brag or make overweight people feel bad about themselves. I just want you to know that even though it takes time and effort, it is beyond worth it to go ahead and do what you need to in order to drop the pounds (whether that's diet and exercise, surgery, Lap Band, or whatever). Not only do I feel healthier, but I know I look better and shopping has actually become more of an enjoyable experience because I have options now that I didn't have before. My only advice: if you are going to lose weight then do it for yourself because you love yourself enough to look, feel, and be the best version of you that you can be.

Do Svidaniya, American Food!

Recently I discovered one of Eagle, Idaho's hidden treasures tucked away in a zone of rapid development. This place of which I speak is a little cafe called The Russian Bear. I have been reluctant to ever try Russian food because of borsht, but thanks to the Russian blini I have since decided that perhaps the food there isn't so scary after all.

Blini is a nice variation to a sandwich as it has standard sandwich fare neatly tucked away into a lovely square crepe. The Blini I chose was comprised of pastrami, Swiss, and mayo. After I took my first bite, I found myself thinking that I may have just accidentally stumbled upon my new favorite food. The atmosphere of the place itself is fairly minimalistic, but very pleasant. The couple who owns The Russian Bear is polite as well as willing to aid in food choice (not to mention the accent is pleasing to the ears). This is definitely a place I plan to visit again as the Treasure Valley area works on furthering its diversification efforts. I would conclude that a cafe offering traditional Russian food is definitely a good addition to the neighborhood.

Just a Little "Homesick"

Dear Seattle:


Greetings! By now we have a long standing relationship of love and hate. However, this last visit, I decided I could no longer live without you in my life. In spite of the fact that you have a tendency to drive me crazy at times, I just cannot seem to stay away from you. It is almost as though I am the domestic abuse victim who keeps returning to the same abusive husband. You beat the life out of me when we cohabitate, but then when we resolve our dispute to the extent that I dare visit you, once again you become my greatest love ever. I keep thinking we should end this vicious cycle at some point but every time I see you or hear your name I fall in love with you all over again.


Try as I might to move on from you to other prospects, such as my current not-so-beloved-but-ever-convenient Boise, I simply cannot bear to live without you much longer. The time has come for me to choose: end our affair or return to you. So much has changed since we first met and I think we could really make a go of it this time, but I don't know if my heart is willing to take that chance again. You are a constant reminder of the dream that was nothing like the reality, but in spite of my disappointment I am not ready to give up on you yet, my beloved.


Anxiously awaiting our next tryst,

Erica

Kathy Griffin: Not so D-List

I was a late bloomer to the whole “Kathy Griffin: My Life on the D-List” show, which is odd considering that I am so addicted to the Bravo “reality” shows and because Kathy and I pretty much have the same irreverent sense of humor. I just started watching her show this season and boy, am I glad I did because last night’s season finale was pretty much one of the coolest celebrity moments ever captured on TV.

Kathy opted to do the closer by visiting an Army hospital in Washington DC. She has gone over to Iraq to perform for the soldiers before, but since these are injured veterans of war, that makes the whole situation a little different. Why I am particularly crushing on this episode is because I love how human she was in front of the camera. You got to see flashes of Serious Kathy in there and because the situation these soldiers are in can be so emotionally devastating, she wanted to offer them all that she had to give, which was the best comedy show ever. She and her assistants took time during the day to wander the grounds, spend time with these soldiers (most of which were amputees), and get to know them. The people she met were incredible. Most of the injured are still super young—as in can’t even legally buy alcohol—and yet they have already lived through what most of us never have to witness in our life time. These “kids” have permanent damage to their bodies that will forever change the way they go about their business so that we might have our freedom and yet they are able to maintain their strength and even a sense of humor about their circumstances. It was incredible to see their determination and resiliency. I found myself crying through a fair portion of the hour because I was so touched by these young men and women and their families who help them throughout their recovery.

What I thought was so cool of Kathy was that she actually had to take a moment to go cry herself because she too was so touched by these soldiers and the emotional strength of their young families. Not only was the fact that she decided to go there knowing it would be hard admirable, but the fact that she let down her comedic exterior and showed us all a part of who she is that we don’t normally see made me respect her even more as an entertainer. It’s so easy for us to avoid seeing those situations, but I think it is important that we do on occasion so that we can remember what others do on our behalf and not take it for granted that we live in a country where we are awarded more freedoms than any other country in the world. Sometimes it takes the awkward situations in life that nobody wants to talk about to remind us of how blessed we truly are. I am grateful to these soldiers for their service and I am grateful to Kathy for going on that trip and sharing with her fans something that is not her usual comedic shtick.

For those of you who have cable, I highly recommend watching the show on one of its many reruns (the one negative about Bravo is that they love to rerun their shows into the ground). If you don’t have cable and your curiosity is aroused enough to want to see it, you can find the episode on either www.bravotv.com or www.youtube.com. I don’t recommend lightly so you know it must be somewhat good if I am putting myself out there saying “watch this”. It doesn’t matter whether you like Kathy Griffin or not (which I don’t understand why you wouldn’t since she is hilarious but whatever), the episode opens your eyes to a new understanding of what our returning soldiers are going through. It would be unpatriotic to not watch the season finale of “Kathy Griffin: My Life on the D-List” and really, you don’t want to be unpatriotic do you?

WTF? (or WTH? should you be offended)

Dear Mother Nature:

Greetings. I am a current resident of Boise, Idaho who is currently rather upset with the ways in which you display your powers. I understand that you are constantly blamed for unfavorable weather conditions and do not receive the respect you deserve. However, I am unimpressed by your flagrant disregard of seasons around here. It is supposed to be spring time. So why am I still running my heater when it is May? Oh, and I really did not appreciate that day this week in which I had to turn the air conditioner on only to have to turn the heater back on the following day. I have worn a sweatshirt to bed 3 of the 7 nights this week. This is not desireable bedtime attire as a single young woman. I plead with you to reconsider your decision to totally mess with the Idahoan heads by allowing it to appear sunny and warm outside when in fact it is windy and only 40 degrees.

We get it! You possess amazing talents that can make us completely miserable (or in this case cold) at the drop of a hat! Now may we please have our spring back?

Sincerely,

Multi-layered May

I had the opportunity to view the film “Miss Pettigrew Lives for a Day” and boy, am I glad I did. I declare Frances McDormand the Queen of Accents. If you didn’t know any better, you would swear she was in fact British or in the case of her role in the movie “Fargo”, a North Dakotan. She played the role of Guinevere Pettigrew perfectly. I must also acknowledge the surprising and rising talent of Amy Adams, who played the role of the starlet Miss Pettigrew teams up with.

The story line is set pre-World War 2 era in London. Miss Pettigrew is a disastrous governess to the point which her employment agency refuses to continue placing her. Out of spite, she steals a job lead from a desk at the agency and sets out to become a “social secretary” to an American starlet. And so the craziness begins. The script is clever, well-written, and absolutely engaging. The cast members were flawless in delivering said script. I would be surprised if this film is not mentioned at some point during awards season. Amy Adams brings an incredible energy to the role of Delysia. I had not seen any of her prior films, but found myself so enamored by her performance that I cannot wait to see where she ends up next.

The movie does have some serious moments throughout although it is comedic overall. The comedy and the dramatic are played equally well though. Overall, I would say this is a delightful show to the point where I will likely own it upon its release to DVD. If it’s playing where you live, you should definitely make a point to see this film. I haven’t been this excited about something I have seen on the big screen in a long time.

book review time!

I just finished reading Elizabeth Gilbert’s memoir Eat Pray Love a couple of weeks ago and I must say that I was impressed at the readability of this book. Gilbert has written it in such a conversational style that I started it one day and next thing I knew it was 3 days later that I was reading the last page. The book is also vivid in its descriptions to the point where the reader can visualize the setting and feel a part of Gilbert’s cultural experiences.

The author wrote this upon returning from her travels abroad post divorce. She chose to divide the book into three sections based on the three countries she lived in over the course of the year. The “eat” section is reference to her stay in Italy. While in Italy, she shares her experiences learning the art of simply enjoying life. She foregoes the traditional Italian architectural and art tourism and spends her time there learning the language, immersing herself in the lifestyle, and eating delicious foods. As she shares this experience, I found myself yearning to eat gelato in the afternoon while writing in a journal at a small bistro. The “pray” section is in reference to Gilbert’s experience at an Ashram in India where she was able to eventually master the art of meditation and the ability to still the mind. This section was probably the least entertaining, but the most informative section. It made me want to learn how to still my own mind through meditation and as most people who know me are aware I have a complete inability to relax so that was a fairly inspirational section of the memoir for me. Finally, the “love” section of the book tells of her time in Indonesia and her rediscovery of allowing herself to love others after her heartbreak. Reading this made me want to place Indonesia, specifically Bali, on my list of places to visit before I die.

Overall, I would recommend this book as one that is both meaningful and entertaining to read. While reading, I was right there with Elizabeth on her journey through self discovery and while I certainly did not experience the journey first hand, I definitely felt as though I was there learning about myself just the same.

and the girl scouts with their wee beedy eyes. . .

Alas! Girl Scout cookie season is over. My stomach and I are both relieved.

Damn those scouts anyway. Lurking in the doorways of the grocery stores, turning cartwheels, and begging the general public to purchase their over-priced, chemically-enhanced-so-they-are-addictive-and-you-can’t-stop-eating-them-until-next-thing-you-know-all-the-thin-mints-are-gone boxes of cookies. I don’t know about you, but I feel bad when I turn the cookie dealing spawn down because I know the money goes toward a good cause. However, what single person really needs 3 boxes of cookies for $11? Really? I avoid the guilt by simply feigning deafness or refusing to make eye contact. Luckily I am blessed with an uncanny knack of being able to tune out the whiny voices of youth. And if I don’t make eye contact, then I don’t have to see the hope of being the top troop shatter in some little girl’s eyes. This technique has successfully kept me from buying the deliciously evil treats for at least 4 years now.

Those around me have unfortunately succumbed to the wiles of these young scouts though. I am forced to try “just one” Samoa and then spend weeks craving the little coconut and chocolate covered bastards. Thanks to Keebler, you can find cookies that are very similar to those of the Girl Scouts at a more reasonable price point. This helps those on a budget still enjoy a peanut butter covered wafer dipped in chocolate. That being said, I have yet to find a generic equivalent for the aforementioned Samoa cookies they sell. I am thinking about writing a letter to Keebler in regard to this travesty. It would go something like this:

To Whom It May Concern:

Greetings, Keebler! I am writing in regard to your cookie line up. It seems as though your company has sampled and stolen the recipes for a substantial amount of Girl Scout cookies in your day which leads me to ask one question. Why have you not reproduced the Samoa brand in all your cookie making glory? You have a knock off cookie for all the other types of Girl Scout cookies, why not the Samoa!? I beg you to please consider recreating this delectable treat under the Keebler brand so that it can be available more than once a year to the masses and at an affordable cost. And if you could make it with Splenda so that it doesn’t make me vomit, that would be greatly appreciated. Thanks!

Perhaps if we band together and start a petition. . .

Then again, it could be a conspiracy between the Girl Scouts and Keebler.

At any rate, I won’t feel guilted into eating their fares for at least another 11 months and for that I am most thankful.

who to choose? NO ONE!

Hot topic of 2008: the election. Of course, was there ever a doubt? Being the “flaming liberal” Dem fem that I am, I happen to be just as torn as the rest of the nation about who to vote for. Neither Democratic candidate can achieve a full majority vote as of yet. What entails a “majority”? According to Wikipedia it is defined as such:
A majority, also known as a simple majority in the U.S., is a subset of a group that is more than half of the entire group. This should not be confused with a plurality, which is a subset having the largest number of parts. A plurality is not necessarily a majority, as the largest subset may be less than half of the entire group.
Alrighty, so even though happy-go-lucky Barack is technically ahead he does not possess a high enough percentage to obtain the majority of the votes required to deem him the final presidential candidate. This should make me satisfied as a formerly devout supporter of the Clinton family (go, Hillary!); however, looking at this year’s election just annoys and confuses me. Who is the best candidate? Who should I rally my support for? Who has the most similar stance on important issues that I do?
I consulted Google for some answers. I took a side by side look at the candidates. Nope. That didn’t help as I found myself disagreeing with some major points of my beloved Hillary and shaking my head at Obama’s non-committal idealism.
I resorted to a couple of “Which Candidate Should I Vote For?” quizzes. The first one informed me that my belief system fell in 0% with any of the candidates, both past and present, running for the 2008 ticket. Okay, so that wasn’t very helpful at all or reassuring for that matter. I am now thinking that I may not be part of the norm in my convictions. The second quiz had me falling in line 77% with Obama and 76% with Hillary on the issues. A 1% discrepancy! No wonder why America is confused and neither candidate can gain an actual majority in the primaries.
I guess the best thing to do at this point is to vote for whom you feel would do the best and pray that it all works out in the end. Perhaps I will try the old fashioned flip a coin technique. Ah, you hard core Republicans have it easy this season since your candidate has already been narrowed down to geriatric war vet, McCain. For the rest of us, this will be one of the most interesting Democratic National Conventions ever. I look forward to seeing how this all shapes up come Election Day in November.

a brief explanation. . .

i am not actually "bitter" per se. i get asked about this all the time as my commonly used handle is "bitter poet". so before anyone assumes they know what that is about, let me explain. it is a line from i poem i wrote using magnetic poetry. "the bitter poet speaks wickedly" is specifically the last line of said poem and i would put it up here for your viewing pleasure, but apparently i forgot to write it down before ridding myself of my magnetic poetry collection this last move i did. oops. my bad. now, go forth and enjoy my rants.