10- Blatantly open drains with no drain strainer thingie on them (I don't even like to reach down into the garbage disposal area if something gets stuck): This may seem silly, unless you have seen the movie Stephen King's It and then it should be understandable. Which leads me to my next one. . .
9- Clowns: Seriously, what the hell is up with these guys? Ugh!
8- Dolls: They remind me of clowns in a way and there is nothing worse than a doll dressed as a clown with the creepy make-up and the blank stare. If you wonder about how someone develops pediophobia (which sounds more like "fear of pedophiles" than "fear of dolls") then I would encourage you to watch the first Child's Play movie.
7- Heights: I get woozy and feel like vomiting just standing on a ladder so that was great when I played Emily in "Our Town" my senior year of high school and had to stay on a 12 foot ladder that was intended to mime my upstairs bedroom for a significant period of time.
6- Being trapped: Which easily ties in with my dislike for elevators and bathroom stalls with tricky latches. I was watching the "Buried Alive" segment on the show Mythbusters the other night and thought I was going to have to turn it off because I couldn't stand seeing the guy getting buried in the coffin while still alive. Which also ties in to my issue with. . .
5- The Dark: This one is pretty typical of small children but embarrassingly enough and much to my mother's chagrin, I had a nightlight until I was 12 and used to fall asleep with a light on all the time back when I lived by myself. Go ahead and laugh. I still do until that shadow starts to take on the shape of the latest escapee from prison.
4- People Sneaking Up On Me From Behind: Don't do it. Not even as a joke. Just trust me and the boys who have shin scars from my kicking them.
3- Social Events: I am a seemingly very extroverted person with extensive public speaking and performance experience and even I still dread the mingling with strangers and mindless small talk. I want to become a hermit just thinking about it and thanks to the current weather situation in Seattle, I may actually achieve that status (I haven't left my house since Tuesday and it is now Friday just to give you an idea).
2- Childbirth: The thought of birthing another human that will inevitably look like an old man or an alien or both from my loins not only petrifies me but disgusts me. Hopefully adoption laws lighten up in the near future because I don't think I can mentally handle feeling something moving inside of me and kicking my bladder for an extended period of time. Plus there's the whole ickiness of water breaking, and blood, and stitches, and something called afterbirth (whatever that is) to contend with. Surely some nice 17 year old out there wants to be adopted into a "good" home?
1- Creatures with more than 4 legs or less than 2: I especially take issue with spiders, bees/wasps/anything that stings, the family of pedes, and those ugly bastards that can survive a nuclear holocaust, cockroaches. Snakes would fall into this category but I am less bothered by them than those listed in the previous sentence. I am cringing and shaking my head just thinking about it. I am grateful to have cats that point out when something invades our sanctuary so that I can get rid of it prior to it defiling our living space. Apparently they are also good for keeping scorpions away, which was an added bonus during our stint in Arizona. Amputees are exempt from this category as they cannot help their situation and pose less of a threat than that hobo in the corner (meaning spider, not homeless train-hopping person).
1 comment:
Ummm..wow.. You should ask my husband about my extreme fear of bee's...For example... There is me, a bee and cliff. There is me jumping off the cliff to my death to escape the bee...yep, pretty much! We have MANY similar fears..Although, some of mine were inspired by my very dramatic and eclectic grandmother who would tell me there was a witch named Jahootie that lived in the fireplace and ate kids on toast. Oh, and that her porcelain dolls got "angry" if I touched their accessories which then I would do because I was me and then be terrified all night and have to keep the tv on to sleep...(still do sometimes). LOVED this post!
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